I just finished cleaning."2. My mother taught me RELIGION."You better pray that will come out of the carpet."3. My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL."If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"4. My father taught me LOGIC."Because I said so, that's why."5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC."If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT."Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."7. My father taught me IRONY."Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS."Shut your mouth and eat your supper."9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM."Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"10. My mother taught me about STAMINA."You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."11. My mother taught me about WEATHER."This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."12. My mother taught. Don’t worry about it. Over the past few months, I’ve probably woken with five different girls wrapped around me from behind. As Kim said, it’s a nice way to wake, given that one probably doesn’t go to bed very often with someone that one doesn’t like. I don’t recall waking like that this morning, but it is comfortable. If you woke wrapped around me because that’s simply how you found yourself, then no foul, as we told you last night. I understand that it could be embarrassing from your end, but none of us will complain if we find ourselves in that situation with you if it was something you didn’t consciously do. There’s no need to feel embarrassed, although I don’t expect my words to cause you not to be embarrassed if you wake like that.”“I’m so glad I overcame my shyness with girls enough to sit with you girls that first day. My subsequent happiness and friendships with most of the pretty girls in 9th grade ... and some of the prettiest seniors is all due to that. I almost declined.
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